I suppose I should be working right now, but this week has been pretty much shit for me. Clifford had a great Monday and then a crappy Tuesday. His new thing is to put his hands around his neck and tell me he is going to kill himself. Apparentally being treated like a normal kid and having discipline is making him depressed. His mom rarely calls anymore and shit...I think the only reason she is coming this weekend is because Friday is Paul's birthday. The school has already said that if he threatens to kill himself one more time he will have to be sent home until he is completely evaluated. Paul and I sat down and explained to him why saying that is wrong and how deeply it affect me because of Bonnie.
Yesterday I had to bring my computer up here at work and once I got it connected (because J's is eaten up with viruses) her monitor went dead. Then I had two spend two hours (which I did not have) finding and connecting monitors that would work. Finally W. and I had to take a new one out of the box and I am afraid J. is not going to like it because it is too big. All in all I have had a pretty shitty week of running around and trying to get things done at home and at work.
Flip (the bird) hit the fan the other night and we thought she broke her leg, but fortunately she only had a concussion and the doc gave her some good birdie pain medicine.
Sometimes I wonder if people call each other to come to the library at the same time. We can be slow as hell and then all of a sudden a ton of people come filing in asking stupid ass questions.
I got a bill for $1380 from my pain doc. and freaked the hell out. It turns out they messed up and I only owed them $15.00. Since I already paid $60.00 I get a credit and most of the money goes to my next visit.
Like you all care.
Sometimes I look at Kat going to Phoenix and the Vampire Ball and I wish I could be like that with no worries. Sometimes when she is pushing me to go do stuff with her and some of the kids (the ones from DW's....I know I should not call them that, but they are still "the kids" to me) I get angry and just want to yell at her that she has to understand I have responabilities right now and I really don't want to get involved with all that drama.
It seems there is a play practice here for the kids and I had no idea. They are downstairs playing with the lights and moving them. Shit. Gotta run down there now and get on to them and then back up here to get everything turned off. Josh was not suppossed to leave until 5 today, but instead left at 4:30 so there is only three of us here.
After work is the best time in the world. I get to make Cliff's lunch, lay out clothes for all three of us, sign papers and get his bookbag together and FINALLY I get to relax and paint or scrapbook. That is my time and DAMMIT and housework (even though my house stinks right now) will not stop me!
Gotta go...Cliff is throwing a fit about homework and I need to get shit done around here.
BTW....Summer is engaged!!! How happy am I?????
Posted by Shannon_50 at October 20, 2004 05:09 PMI know how you feel. Sometimes I see people going here and doing that and I think "I wanna do that" then I remember I have a husband a home who would #1 not want to go and do that or #2 can't. And then I also remember I have work and school and we are trying to get a house or I have a doctor's appointment (not as many as you but i have been there a few times recently, i think they all came up at once) and I have duties to those things and they come first. I wish I could say "fuck you" to rsponsibility, too. being an adult is hard.
Posted by: jessa at October 21, 2004 09:32 AM